By Calvin Harris
The Power of The Masculine Aspect
The masculine aspect of one’s nature gets a bad rap these days. This needs to be cleared up by those of us that have become enlightened on the subject of Gender Expression. You know that concept of one’s external expression of identified gender, through one’s attire, how they act and other factors, generally measured on the barometer scale between masculinity and femininity.
The fact is all humans, to a degree, exhibit mental and physical traits of both masculinity and femininity.
The phrase “Man Up'“ gets its power to become an insult when directed to people that are embodying it but are unsure of what the masculine end of the spectrum should be. They somehow believe Masculinity is an “achieved status” that needs to be continually proven.
Historically, “manhood” was achieved culturally by the 3-Ps ritual: provide, protect, and procreate, a ritual of going from puberty to adulthood which typically meant demonstrating a capacity to provide, protect, and procreate, or some combination thereof. It showed a delineation or shift in status from juvenile to adult. In looking at these words closely - ‘providing’, ‘protecting’, and ‘procreating’ - we can see that these words have a lot to do with the response of maintaining a family unit.
In current day America and other post-industrial nations, these traits of providing, protecting, and procreating have also become a woman’s descriptor. We can see in homes today that the 3-Ps are a shared responsibility of husband and wife, or partner and partner, and this masculine trait is more obvious in the female in the case of the single mother who is the sole supplier - providing, protecting and in some instances artificially procreating in the family.
Therefore, 3-Ps basic delineator as a masculine aspect of male adulthood is no longer the standard for masculinity and thus has been evolving within the last few decades.
Masculinity: It has become precarious, so much so that an insecure guy of the species feels he must have his masculinity proven, and if challenged this must be upheld with an immediate answer.
The Pieces of Masculinity
In order to prove - or defend - his masculinity, a guy needs to act in ways that will readily be recognized as masculine. But “readily recognized” behaviors are often enacted in archetypal stereotypes of masculinity, particularly aspects of masculinity such as violence (i.e., fighting), risk-taking (e.g., excessive alcohol consumption) and forms of hooking up and promiscuous sexuality (it does not matter the sexual orientation, just as long as he can hide his own feelings except for anger). Our guy holds conversations with friends that are sexist, misogynist, or homophobic, as long as these conversations serve his purpose of appearing masculine; these aspects of masculinity are sometimes labeled “hypermasculinity” or “hostile masculinity” on the gender scales.
Within the last few decades, Masculinity has taken on new definitions and rituals that are more positive and self-sustaining to the person and his community. Action words highlight leadership, decisiveness, intelligence, perseverance, and problem-solving. Measures assess these aspects of masculinity and encourage the revealing of authenticity within the Masculine dynamic.
“What it means to be a man varies with ethnicity, nationality, age, and generational cohorts, as we move through life stages.”
Cultural men’s groups within the U.S., have added to the conversation: African American male groups have added to their definitions on masculine identity with such terms as responsibility and accountability, autonomy, respect, and spirituality as important components of masculinity. Latino-American men’s groups include concepts such as familismo (family), personalismo (personality), simpatia (cordiality), and respeto (respect). Similar themes, I am sure can be identified in other multinational studies, with participants identifying the primary components of masculinity as being a man of honor, being in control of one’s own life, having the respect of friends, having a good job and coping with problems on your own.
These are the new watchwords when you find yourself being asked to ‘Man Up.’ Yes, it is more about the change of perspective rather than more of the same.
Where to Go From Here
By utilizing an investigation of your own comfort level with your masculinity through your interactions with others, this should give you the ability to examine what these power dynamics mean to you. How comfortable you are with these new definitions is inherent in your words and actions. This is a way to educate yourself about the various potential meanings of masculinity, and for you to come up with an understanding of masculinity that embodies your authenticity. Give yourself the space for decisions to create beneficial social interactions and habits – so that they create an outcome that you can honor.